Of Summers and Camps.

of summers and camps...
Come summer vacations and these summer camps crop up faster than you can say hopping grasshoppers...
indeed so many of them that you are spoilt for choice...there are camps for everything from drawing to dance to creative arts to skating to swimming...you name it.
not that i have anything against them...why should i ? when they are so convenient - i just enroll my child and pay a fortune and get a few hours of free time for myself...quaint !
nor am i jealous that i never had any summer camps...for us kids, summers were a time of sleeping in till late,swinging in handbuilt swings from huge shady trees, eating mangoes till you were about to burst,reading comics,hanging out with friends in any water body that wasnt too green or too black in colour...and in general, lazing around...
or we went to our grandparents' where we were pampered to no end, and did these same things with a different set of friends...
and we turned out just about fine ? didnt we ? ( or so we like to think...;) )
but no, its not me going green with envy here...
you see, i am not a very campy sort of person - as in this summer campy sorts....ok, you send your kids to a camp, but we need to know that not all kids are cut out for it...nor are all comfortable with the varied activites on offer...each kid has his/her own talent that should be allowed to bloom naturally...
there's no point in making your kid go dancing if all he really likes is drawing..."oh, he must learn some other skills too!" some kids just enjoy being indoors, not every child is outdoorsy...so you may save the tennis and swimming for later..
but the camps i see around are a mixed bunch, its a buffet of sorts...in trying to attract everyone, they justify none...they claim to teach everything...how fair is it to let a child go through the routine of drawing,skating,alphabets/phonics,swimming,singing/music and a sport all in 3 hours flat ?
there may be an arguement here that kids need to discover all in order to find what their natural flair is...right, but once that is established, need you still keep pushing for more to prove your child is a super child ?
and really, is it so bad to let your children hang around each others' place and just have child like fun ? is being a bit bored such a waste of time ? isnt being bored akin to being pushed to do something creative ? and as parents, does the onus not lie on us to provide some impetus, some stimulation ? or is it that we are just too lazy or too occupied for it, and look for summer camps as an escape ? school through the year and summer camps in vacations ? so where do we, as parents, stand here ?
finally, all said and done, it is upto each parent to decide what is best for their child...and not get carried away by this latest fad !
come to think of it, how about some real summer camping of our own ? a group of parents and kids ? i bet the fun of it will last our kids the entire summer !
so, happy summers and happy camping - whatever way you choose !

Que Sera Sera

Monday, April 12, 2010
Que sera sera.....
"Honey,baby, did you like that play centre we went to yesterday ?"
"zooom....zooom...."
"sweetiepie, you will be going there from thursday, for a few hours...you will make new friends ! wont u ?"
"zooom...zoooom.....police siren....eeeeyoooo....eeeeyoooo....zooom..."
"listen to me sweetheart, are you sure you want to go there ? will you be able to adjust ? there may not be any of your old buddies there..."
"craaasssshhhhhh.....fire engine....ting ding ding ding...."
"stop it ! i am worried about u....just tell me - you will be comfortable there, wont u ? your new teacher seemed real nice ! i am sure you will have a lot of fun there !"
"dinosaur......grrrrhhhhh....police....eeeyoooo....eeeeyoooo.....superman....zooom....zoooom....is it thurday now ?"
"no, its 3 days from now."
"superman....zoooom.....punch..punch..punch...dinosaur.....aaaaaahhhhh.....ambulance.....teeee....teeee...."

well, so much for my conversation ! and so much for all the prodding to get a yes out of him ! though i am a wee bit apprehensive about his venturing into the new world, i am kind of glad he did not catch up on my anxiety....
but this little conversation (yes, i still insist on calling it that !) did make me wake up to something.

here was i, all worked up over the forthcoming exploits of my kid, but naturally, being a mother and having seen the world, and known it ( well, in parts atleast ), i may be justified in my borderline-paranoid behaviour...

but there was my little guy, enjoying his own little world of here and now, totally oblivious to the dimensions of space and time that awaited him.
what did he care about thursday ? was today thursday ? no ! was now thursday ? no ! was here thursday ? no ! then what the hell man ? whats all the noise about ? we will tackle thursday when we see it ! let me enjoy my here and now, whatever it is called !

i know we cannot afford that kind of thinking always, being in that ubiquitous mindset of adulthood. perhaps we worry a bit too much of what tomorrow will be like, how we will handle the problems that may be, if we will be able to meet our goals, fulfill our dreams, reach our destination, find our love...
and every moment of here and now is thus lost to the quest of the mirage, that of the moment to come...in doing so, we lose out on now, on here, on life.
if only we could adopt the attitude of these kids, and live life to the tune of Que sera sera....
if only we could enjoy what we have with us now, and not worry of whether we still will have it tomorrow...
if only we could love the gifts of life that god has bestowed on us this moment, and not wonder how we will cope when they are snatched away from us....
if only we could make sand castles on the beach, and not be anxious about the waves that may wash it away soon...
if only we could learn to live....here...now....
que sera sera
whatever will be,will be
the future's not ours to see
que sera sera...

From Letter...To Twitter...with love.

Dear Twitter...
I read about you in the papers today; and i am glad to see that you are doing pretty well, have made a name for yourself. and grandpa is proud of u son !



it reminds me of my own days...how people waited with bated breath for my arrival. i felt quite like a hero ! how they rushed to me as the postman came to town - all trying to know who i belonged to. and the one who finally got me felt like he had just been crowned king !


i brought all kinds of news - but mostly good, a few worrying bits here n there perhaps, yes, and tears - i got to see those almost always....tears of joy, tears from missing the loved ones, tears of anxiety, tears of the unforeseen future...


your grandma, my darling telegram ! now she was more modern, sophisticate ! what airs she had ! would be worth so much more for a mouthful of words ! high maintenance you know ! but we got on pretty well...i told stories and she the breaking news, and between us the world was at peace.


until your dad was born - the email ( i still dont approve of that name ). so you see, until my time the messages were so personal. it went directly from one person's heart to the others, it had the special touch of one's own handwriting. it was meant for a very selective,exclusive audience. it oozed of patience,endeavour,tenderness and care. the very fact that it existed showed how much the reader meant to the writer - it was just so precious.


emails were personal to a point too. ofcourse you didnt have the writers own written word or the smell of the letter, but yes, it could reach heart to heart..until they started forwards...i may sound old fashioned here, but where is the love ? u get a mail, you click forward to a whole bunch of them, so where at any point do you ever think of any friend in particular ? ya,ya, i'll go n sit on my rocking chair, u kids...


and then there was your mom, she had so many names - orkut,facebook,friendster,flixster,bebo n what not...


she made your dad look lame...she had so much to say, had an opinion on everything and shared her life with hundreds of friends, some she had never even met ! but strangely, she carried on with the family tradition of making people stay in touch...she brought together long lost friends, rekindled love, reconciled and reconnected, made new friends,made bitching look a lot more trendy and in general,welcomed the whole world into her arms...


and then, one fine day, you were born ! the impatient,fast,ever-on-the-go-you ! your very first cry at birth was hailed as a tweet ! and boy ! did you become famous ! you have made tens of thousands of fans and followers who hang on to your every word ! you are the epitome of online existence ! everyone from the boy next door to his uncle and aunt, to the most popular of celebrities are hooked ! they just cant do without their daily fix of you ! so you get to shout out your mind in the minimum of words and compel the world to listen ! nothing is personal or exclusive any more. The more the merrier !


i have a feeling that my days are numbered...but i dont regret it. i have had my run, and it couldnt have been better. it was the most rich,fulfilling and quenching experience. i know also that whatever time i do have will be made special by people out there. people who know the value of me.


mothers who write to their children in far away lands...their emotions scribbled on paper, blurred by the tears they bleed..


star crossed lovers, for whom each alphabet on paper from their beloved accounts for every heart beat they would last...


students who write to elderly,oft-forgotten teachers, expressing their gratitude in emotions, not emoticons...


children writing to their grandparents, who will read and reread each word till their eyes hurt - from the reading, but also from the weeping...


soldiers,fighting for their nation, in solitary peaks outside the reach of technology, to loved ones left behind...


and to each reader, the feel, the touch, the smell, the love of every letter will be a treasure to cherish forever....


so i lie down here and rock back and forth in peace, knowing i have made a difference...


and good luck to you lad...as you keep tweeting away to glory !

As I close my eyes...

As i close my eyes...


The heart jumps instantly


out of all confines....


and races ahead...


into a world,full of dreams...


the stars begin to swim


in a cloud around me...


dew drops shiver and shine


and sparkle with such glee...


butterflies come a-fluttering


and flowers bloom so bright....


its a lovely blast of colours


o ! 'tis such a delightful sight !


the oceans rumble n grumble


and waves keep up the dance...


the gulls dive and glide


as smooth as a trance...


the moonlight so silver


feels cool against my skin...


silvery silvery is my world


and silvery white the grin...


knotted into my hair


is the sweetness of this breeze...


smells of jasmine n orchids


n woods n meadows n trees...


i swim in clouds of petals


n dive in the chirp of birds....


i drink the laughter of kids


echoing deep into the woods...


i see the golden honey comb


n feel the gold on my lips....


drops of nectar,droplets of manna


sweet drops on my finger tips...


i float into the fog


and see clouds descending on lakes...


where lotuses abound


and peace forever stays...


and i feel my being rise


into a heaven of pure bliss...


where love and joy alone reside


and give sorrow a miss...


and i dare not open


these windows to the world....


dare not break,dare not shatter


these dreams of silver and gold....


the dreams that make


the dreams that break...


the dreams that

keep me alive.

On your first day at school...

On your first day @ school...

So, its that time of the year again...school bells will begin to reverberate through the air, parents will set out hunting for designer school bags, water bottles, snack boxes,raincoats - the entire paraphernalia one would associate with education.

Its going to be the second time for my son - his second year at school. its a lot different today than it was last year. Last year was all about tears,hugging,clutching,sobbing...and sleepless nights for me...

This year, i was told in no unspecific terms - "dont bother to come drop me, i use the school transport !" Infact, i had a pretty hard time, telling him as he strutted his stuff in his new mickey school bag, that school begins TOMORROW,not today ! And the argument continued to the point i thought i would have to google how it came to be that weekends are the way they are - and why cant schools have no sabbaths !

So, its a lot easier on my nerves. And i stand a proud mother seeing a confident child,eager to venture out into the world, eager to meet old friends, unafraid to make new ones, willing to learn - even if it means a bit of hurt and pain at times...
And i hope along with all of this, his education includes the things most untaught, greatly imbibed - but weaved intricately into character in these very formative and tender years...
So my child, its good to be confident and make new friends - but do not forget your old ones...
Its good to be ambitious and race ahead, but do not forget to lend a hand to the child that fell...
do not forget to say a kind word here, wipe a tear there, say thank you to your maushi...
do not join in the ridicule of another child, in the oppression of the weak, mockery of someone differently abled...
do remember to be forgiving, to let go, to rebond, to be polite - even to the ones you think do not matter...
and to share - not just your colours or your pencils, but your joys and your laughter too...
its okay child, to get into fights and brawls, but leave it there...dont let it weigh upon your heart, and thus on your future...
its okay to say no, but do it so it doesnt hurt...
its okay to say yes, but do it responsibly...
do not forget baby, that the classroom doesnt end beyond the four walls; rather, it begins there - a different education, whose teachings will matter just the same...
do not forget to keep your eyes and ears open, so you can imbibe these - tiny lessons of life...
always let the hunger of knowledge, of knowing more, learning more, burn within...for that is what keeps one alive...
and most of all, child, do not forget to be yourself - you, who are a spark, a flash of divinity, an identity by yourself...and a mother's life...
go child, happy feet,dancing eyes, go...you have a lot to learn...

There's something about the wind...

Not just the wind actually. Why.. it is often windy here and i dont feel a thing.

But going on a two-wheeler, when it has just stopped raining,and the gods up there keep teasing us with a little drizzle now and a little drizzle then,... and there is just a spot of sunshine, the breeze as cool as ever, and the air as pure as it can get....wooohooooo !!! I just couldnt resist it... let my hair down and felt it flirt with the wind...

As they say, the joy of journey is in the journey itself, not the destination. And what a beautiful journey it was ! Everything lush green, trees drooping down to kiss,yellow flowers in full bloom showering down as we pass by...and letting by an aroma that lingers... the aroma of hope, of sweet promises...

And tiny sparrows chirping and singing, and the little violets by the road, oblivious to the passing vehicles, danced about in their own bliss...

And the man with his fruit-cart - full of fresh,bright fruits - every colour imaginable, and the Ganpati idols on display - faith dripped in colour, striking a magnificient contrast with the green all around...

And, how can i forget, the cute little potholes, that made for a perfect splashing ground, and the nasty little cars, who derived silly pleasure from splashing muddy water on the pedestrians ... Boooooo...

Aaah ! They do it with envy ! Just look at the expression on their faces, the ones in their little boxes on wheels - going green with envy, as they see how much more fun, how much more life there is in riding my style...oh ! you poor poor poor little people in your fancy suffocating cars ! You have NO IDEA ! How it feels to blend with nature, to experience the abundance all around, to feel blessed for having felt one with nature in this beautiful, bright world... It gives so much joy, so much hope... I woudnt trade places - Ever ! Awww....my shweet shweet scooty !

And i wished today, i could go far far away, far into those green hills, without having to stop - ever... some day, some day - i promised myself. And i returned, refreshed, rejuvenated.

life's unfolding....growing..

i was out yesterday at a hospital with a bunch of youngsters...most of them atleast a decade younger to me... there was so much excitement, so much hope, so much vision all around.. got to talk to a few of them, with questions preceded by my favourite address - didi ! kids just fresh out of school... all trying to be world-wise, learning the ways of the world...infact, some seemed a lot world-wiser than my old self !
and for a brief moment, i contemplated how it would feel to work around these young tots ! fresh-faced bubbly little chums ! i wondered if they had something i had lost in the process of growing up - not the vivacity, nor curiosity...i have enough stock of these... but wide-eyed hope !
with age comes a maturity, a general acceptance of things the way they are.. you know what is and what isnt within your power to do or to control. you know certain things are best left to destiny.. it does not mean you succumb without a fight, but that the giving up of arms comes after a great deal of thought - it means you know you cannot keep fighting destiny with worn-out tools only designed to make a fool of you, but you also know to keep your eyes and ears open for that chance opening of a door, that transient parting of clouds that lets in just a streak of hope.
with age, comes a confidence, from knowledge, but also from ignorance. you know the strength of your powers, of your knowledge, but you also know its limitation. you know when to open your mouth and when to keep it shut lest you become famed for your foot-in-mouth syndrome !
with age, comes a purpose to life, a proper listing of priorities, a set-out agenda.. which makes the little defeats of life bearable.
with age, comes self-realization... where one knows what one truly wants,yearns,craves for...
with age, one understands enough to know what is accepted of you from society, and still has respect for the deeper,truer feelings of the heart - and the fine line that distinguishes the two is at once all too clear, and yet too maleable and pointless.
with age comes love.. when finally the quest is over, the quench satiated, the heart is at rest and the realization that love is,love can be, dawns with a maddening brilliance.
with age, comes an inner peace from the turmoils around.. because you begin to see the deeper human nature lurking through human behaviour.. you know people never intend to hurt, they just want to reinstate the validity of their existence.. and mostly are too afraid to say they are afraid, and what vents out as anger and insult is just fear.
with age comes humility, with age comes self respect, with age comes beauty - the wrinkles and greying notwithstanding :)
for what is ageing but a gradual,beautiful unfolding of the person that is you, an inward journey to find what lies at the core of one's being...strengths,weaknesses,courage,timidity,laughter,sadness,joy,tears,love,acceptance,denial,wanting,dreaming...

and so, when i go today, i know i will be at a lot more ease, knowing i have something they are yet to achieve .. and absorb the atmosphere of excitement and curiosity and feel very much at home.